14 pieces of advice every young adult needs to know
Clinically reviewed by Dr. Chris Mosunic, PhD, RD, MBA
Young adults, we’re sharing the life advice we wish we'd gotten at your age. From dealing with anxiety to finding your purpose, here are 14 tips to help you thrive.
Young adulthood (ages 18-25) is one of those weird in-between areas of life where everything is happening at once, and nothing feels solid. You think you need to know who you are, what you want, and how to achieve your goals, but you may not even know how to cook a *real* meal or remember to separate your whites while you’re doing laundry. And the worst part is, it can feel like everybody else has it together except you.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed, behind, or unsure, know that this is completely normal at this age. The world often asks for a lot while simultaneously explaining very little. But the truth is that trying stuff out and making mistakes is an important part of young adulthood.
Let’s dive into some pro-tips that may help you feel like you have a firmer grip on your life. It’s all about small acts of self-care that support your mental health, as well as a few daily practices that can help you feel a little more grounded.
You don’t have to have it all figured out right now, but you can keep putting one foot in front of the other as you explore all the ups and downs of life.
14 pieces of advice for young adults
Here’s the thing about advice: It’s like a gift that you can decide to keep or exchange for something else. We know that unsolicited advice can be annoying, so feel free to take as much or as little of it as feels right to you.
We decided to poll our Calm editorial team and ask each member for some advice they’d love to give to their younger self, or that they wished they’d had between the ages of 18-25.
Here’s where we landed.
1. Anxiety is a lot, but you do have some control.
It’s normal to feel totally overwhelmed when anxiety strikes. But that doesn’t mean you're totally powerless. While you can’t always control when anxiety comes on, you can take actions to interrupt, calm, or even stop it in its tracks.
Here are a few tips to help you take back your power:
Use the S.T.O.P. method when spiraling: Stop, take a breath, observe what’s going on, and proceed with intention. It helps stop the spiral mid-way, before you get too sucked in.
Start a bare-minimum mental health routine: It doesn’t need to look like much. Just one glass of water, one stretch, or one moment of stillness can be enough.
Keep a list of sensory-grounding tools: These can help you reconnect with your body. Try soft socks, a hot shower, or simply stand barefoot on grass for a few minutes.
💙 Explore more ways to find your calm during the Tools For Stress and Anxiety series with Dr. Julie.
2. Prioritize learning and growing, and you’ll never be bored.
You’re not supposed to have it all figured out at 22. And honestly, you probably won’t even have it all figured out at 32. You’re evolving, and it’s okay if your goals and dreams do too.
Here are a few ways you can encourage learning and growth in your own life:
Experiment without pressure: Take on short-term roles, side gigs, or volunteer opportunities to test what lights you up. You never know when inspiration might hit.
Notice what energizes you: After a conversation, task, or experience, ask yourself, “Did that drain me or fill me up?” Soon, you’ll start noticing patterns and learn what interests you.
Write your ‘anti-resumé’: This is essentially a list of the jobs, classes, or hobbies you didn’t love and why. Clarity often comes from contrast.
Follow curiosity, not just passion: Passion is loud, but curiosity is quieter… and often more sustainable. If there’s something you want to get curious about, explore it.
Know that no path is permanent: Careers are not linear. Many people have rerouted, changed directions, and taken breaks. Even if you make a decision now, know that you can always shift gears if you feel like you need to.
3. You don’t have to figure it all out right now. Just ask: What’s one next step that feels okay?
When you’re unsure what your future’s supposed to look like, it’s easy to freeze — trying to think through every outcome or avoid making the “wrong” choice. But clarity usually comes after you take a step, not before.
Try these mindset shifts the next time you’re stuck:
Reframe it as a next step, not a forever choice: Tell yourself you’re not committing to a life sentence, but just the next thing.
Flip a coin, and then check your gut: Sometimes, clarity shows up in your reaction to randomness.
Ask yourself what the worst-case scenario looks like: Then, ask yourself if you can handle it. Spoiler alert: You most likely can.
4. Learning how to set boundaries can be a mental-health game changer.
It can be hard to balance this new adult life with the feeling that you need to please others. After all, this is a huge part of childhood — getting good grades, completing chores, finishing homework. But as you grow, you get to set boundaries to protect your energy from not just others, but also your own burnout. Because if you say yes to everyone else, you’ll have nothing left for yourself.
Try the following practices to enforce your boundaries:
Use a pause phrase: Practice saying, “I need to check my schedule and get back to you.” That one sentence buys you some time and space.
Name your non-negotiables: Make a list of your personal non-negotiables, such as sleep, alone time, and weekends off. Guard them like your mental health depends on it… because it does.
Disappoint with compassion: Remember that you can disappoint someone and still be a good person.
Read more: How to set healthy boundaries in relationships
5. Build a good foundation for your finances (even when it’s uncomfortable).
Be realistic about where you are with your finances. If you can’t afford to go out to the fancy restaurant, be honest with your friends and suggest an alternative. Chances are you’re not the only one.
Also, if you didn’t order the guacamole or have a drink, speak up for yourself and ask if you can Venmo for the food you did get. You’re not being cheap. You’re trying to make rent. Plus, your honest communication will probably bring you closer to others.
If you want to take better charge of your money, here are a few tricks you can try:
Track your spending for one week: There shouldn’t be any judgment. Just get curious about where your money is going, so you can make changes as needed.
Automate one thing: Consider automatically adding to savings, auto-bill payments, or debt payments. When there’s less friction, there’s more follow-through.
Find support: Using free resources like NerdWallet, following financial creators you know and respect on social media, or considering nonprofit credit counseling can be more helpful than you think.
Read more: Money anxiety: 5 tips to help you stop worrying about money
6. Your friends will help you get through it all. Invest your time and effort in them.
Making friends as an adult can feel really hard, especially if you’re no longer in school or have moved somewhere new. But honestly, you’re not the only one craving connection. Most people your age are looking to meet and expand their social circles, so it's a great time to put yourself out there.
There are many people who are in the same boat as you, so if you want to make new friendships, consider the following:
Be the one who reaches out: Everyone wants to be invited. Don’t wait for others to initiate.
Look for low-pressure community spaces: The best way to find new friends is through common interests. So, local classes, mutual aid groups, book clubs, or gaming communities can be goldmines.
Nurture the “almost” friends: You know who they are. The coworker you laugh with? The neighbor you wave at? Text them. That’s how friendships grow.
Put energy into people who want to see you: While being the one to reach out is a great way to connect with others, it’s also okay to stop giving your time or attention to those who aren’t equally interested in cultivating a friendship with you. Spend your time on the people who want to be in your orbit.
💙 Explore Jay Shetty’s top tip for making new friends with his Curiosity Builds Connection session.
7. You’re not responsible for saving the world alone.
There’s a lot going on—climate stress, war, injustice, rising costs—it’s easy to get overwhelmed. And while this overwhelm is normal, if you let yourself stay there, you probably won’t be able to participate in whatever change you want to see in the world.
Break things down into small, manageable steps and always remember to tend to your mental and physical health along the way.
Try one of these tips when you’re feeling helpless and want to take action:
Focus your impact: Pick one cause you care about and find a way to get involved, whether that’s donating, volunteering, or amplifying the message.
Beware of your inputs: Limit doomscrolling, and instead, follow accounts that focus on solutions, community care, and resilience in activism.
Redefine resistance: Remember that joy, rest, and art can all be radical acts of support and resistance, too.
8. You don’t need to convince anyone of your worth.
The only person you need to convince that you’re “enough” is yourself, and spoiler alert: you already are. Whenever you need reminding, take a moment to write down three things that make you smile about yourself, even if they’re small.
You can also try these steps when you feel stuck:
Track what’s working: Make a “done” list instead of a to-do list. And yes, even brushing your teeth counts.
Lower the bar on purpose: Break things down until they’re laughably doable. For instance, opening a work document might be your biggest win that day, and that’s okay.
Honor the effort: Celebrate effort, not just outcomes.
9. You don’t need a massive spa day to feel better.
Social media has made us all think self-care isn’t self-care unless it involves expensive candles, spa days, or fancy body treatments, but that isn’t true. Sometimes, self-care can be as easy as a one-minute meditation or a warm shower.
Small acts of self-care, like flossing, or bigger acts of self-care, like setting boundaries, all count. The best self-care is the kind that meets you where you actually are.
Here are a few check-ins to make sure you’re actually taking care of yourself:
Body check-in: Hungry? Tired? In need of a hug or some water? Start there.
Mental health check-in: What thought keeps repeating today? What is it trying to tell you?
Emotional check-in: Can you name your feeling? Naming it often softens its grip.
💙 For a quick moment of self-care, explore the College Collection filled with meditations specifically for college students.
10. You can do it all, but you can’t do it all at once.
We’re here to remind you that you can do hard things, and you can also give yourself space to rest and recalibrate as you go. Slow and steady wins the race, remember?
And even more importantly, you don’t have to “earn” rest by burning the candle at both ends. There’s no award for the person who hits burnout first.
If you start to feel the pressure to do everything all at once, try to:
Let go of the myth of balance: Life comes in seasons. Some will be work-heavy, while others will be friendship-rich. And honestly, some are just about surviving, and that’s okay.
Define success on your own terms: Is it peace? Is it stability? Is it being able to sleep at night? That counts, and it’ll help you figure out exactly what makes you happy and how to get there.
Prioritize sleep: You can’t make your dreams come true if you’re exhausted. No matter how hard you want to work or how quickly you want to achieve your goals, make sure you’re also getting good sleep. Your brain and body will thank you.
11. Finding yourself is a lifelong adventure.
Discovering who you are isn’t something you check off a list — it’s something that unfolds over time. It’s tempting to chase a clear identity or ‘final’ version of yourself. But the truth is, that’s not how life works. You’ll change, grow, unlearn, and relearn. Some days it’ll feel clear. Other days, not so much. That’s normal. You’re not behind. You’ve got time to find your way.
Try these ideas when you feel like you need some help figuring out who you are:
Try journaling: Journal freely about what feels true for you now, without worrying how it sounds. Free-writing can help surface things you didn’t know you were carrying.
Explore: Seek out books, media, or spaces that affirm or reflect parts of your identity that you’re still working out.
Try new things: Give yourself permission to experiment, pivot, or shift direction, even if it means disappointing others. You’re allowed to change.
12. Nature is the best medicine for overscrolling. Try to make it out for at least 10 minutes a day.
Social media can be a lifeline but also a drain at the same time. It can help you connect with others, but it can also lead to FOMO and feelings of low self-esteem. Here’s the thing: when you scroll, you’re comparing your insides to someone else's outsides. And even if you know you’re looking at a curated feed, it’s still tough not to compare your life to theirs.
If you’re constantly scrolling, but still feel isolated or overwhelmed, it might be time to get out of your digital world and go out into the world.
Here are a few ways to halt your doomscrolling:
Go for a walk: Put your phone away, or use it to play music, or a podcast (with notifications silenced) and move your body. Feel the breeze on your face, notice what you see around you. This is a great way to get you feeling more grounded and back in the present moment.
Spend some time in a green space: If you have access to a park, garden, or hiking trail, take advantage. Spending time in nature is shown to help reduce stress and boost mental health.
Invite friends to go do something outside with you: Rather than scrolling through social media, invite friends to go do something with you. This allows for real face-to-face connection, and you’re far more likely to be able to talk about your life and experience, and hear about other people’s challenges and struggles when you’re hanging out IRL.
Set boundaries with your phone: Limit how long you spend on social media. Set a timer, or find apps that lock your phone after a certain amount of time.
Read more: The real reason you can’t put down your phone
13. It’s okay to speak up for yourself when needed. You’re not being annoying, you’re advocating for yourself.
Advocating for yourself—whether at the doctor’s office, in class, or with family—does not mean being aggressive; it means you’re ensuring you’re being cared for and respected in your day-to-day life.
Now that you’re navigating the world without your parents by your side, it’s incredibly important to learn to speak up for yourself when needed. Just make sure you’re doing it respectfully and calmly.
Here are a few ways to practice speaking up.
Practice what you want to say: Write down what you want to say before tough conversations to build clarity and confidence.
Set simple boundaries: Use simple boundary phrases like “That doesn’t work for me” or “I need something different.”
Don’t fret: Remind yourself that saying what you need is simply communicating, and not causing a fight or confrontation.
14. You can’t change the past, so let yourself off the hook for any “mistakes” you make. You’re doing the best you can with the information you have.
Making mistakes is part of growing up and learning. And as long as you’re learning from your missteps, you’re doing great. Some people refer to this as “failing up,” and it can be a fun way to look at it. Every mistake you make is information you’re gathering about how you want to be in the world.
Missed that deadline at work? Now you know you’ll need to better manage your time. Made a joke that accidentally hurt a friend’s feelings? Now you know to be careful with your words and to apologize when you misstep.
Feeling like you messed up? Try the following:
Hold yourself accountable and own up to your mistakes: If you make an error, make it better, or apologize if needed. The people in your life are far more likely to respect you when you admit you’ve messed up and express that you want to learn and grow from the error.
Always apologize if you hurt someone’s feelings: Maybe you were just joking, or maybe you think they took you too seriously, but it doesn’t matter. If you’ve hurt someone, make amends. Everyone has varying levels of sensitivity, and someone’s current life experiences can also affect how they receive other people’s words, jokes, or teasing.
Reframe mistakes as data: If you failed once, it’s simply feedback. You’ll know what to do better the next time around. Rejection is redirection.
Advice for young adults FAQs
What are the best mental health tips for young adults?
The best mental health advice is advice that is achievable and attainable, so start small. Drink a glass of water before your coffee, get outside for five minutes, or talk to someone instead of bottling things up. Mindfulness practices like grounding exercises or journaling can also help you feel more present.
If you’re struggling more than usual, it could also be beneficial to seek therapy or join a support group. You don’t have to wait until it gets unmanageable: Preventative support is real support, too.
What life advice would you give a young adult today?
Start where you are. You don’t have to wait to feel confident, prepared, or perfectly qualified. Just take the next doable step.
You don’t have to figure it all out right now. In fact, this stage in your life isn’t for that: It’s about gathering data, trying things on, and learning what doesn’t work.
And don’t think it has to be perfect, either. Ask for help early. Rest without guilt. Pay attention to what makes you feel alive, and not just what looks impressive from the outside. Focus on building a life that feels right to you, even if no one else fully understands it yet.
Why is young adulthood so hard sometimes?
Young adulthood is full of transitions, and unfortunately, transitions are hard. You’re navigating your identity, career, relationships, finances, and mental health all at once, often without a reliable roadmap or support system.
There’s also the pressure of social media, where it just seems like everyone else has a plan (or at the very least, a Pinterest-perfect apartment). On top of that, many people carry emotional weight from childhood or systemic stressors like racism, economic inequality, or climate anxiety. It’s all genuinely difficult, and acknowledging that is not a weakness.
How do I stop comparing myself to everyone else?
Start by noticing when comparison shows up. Who or what are you comparing yourself to? And what does that reveal about what you value, or who you think you should be?
Most of the time, we’re not actually jealous of a particular thing that someone else has. Instead, we’re reacting to a deeper desire or insecurity. Once you know what’s underneath the comparison, you can shift your focus back to what you need.
Practicing gratitude and limiting social media can help, but so can redefining success based on your own values instead of someone else’s highlight reel. Reframe it by showing yourself you’re not behind: You’re just on a different path.
Calm your mind. Change your life.
Mental health is hard. Getting support doesn't have to be. The Calm app puts the tools to feel better in your back pocket, with personalized content to manage stress and anxiety, get better sleep, and feel more present in your life.
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